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Sunday
May132012

The Mother Load

Today is the day when the world acknowledges the wonderful work we do. Mothers, by default, shoulder the responsibility of raising fine young adults who will be productive members of society. This is not easy and pulling it off successfully without your little darlings hating you at the end of it takes real finesse. The burden of Motherhood is the obligation to ALWAYS put your children first, cater to their every need, protect them from danger and help make their dreams come true without raising spoilt little brats. They will then go on to produce and raise their own talented and worthwhile offspring. (Of course they won't do this the way YOU would have done it, but you will be smart enough NOT to interfere.)

Do NOT be fooled, once your children leave home the job is FAR from over. They will still require unending support whilst being highly irritated with any unwanted or unsolicited advice or help. If you are the mother of boys it is EXTREMELY important to live in a desirable location. Don't delude yourself with ideas that your sparkling personality or home baked lasagna will be enough to lure them home for regular visits. If you live in the Sunshine State or have a cool apartment in New York or London you can be sure that they will turn up several times a year with family and friends in tow; but if you happen to live in Detroit or South Dakota don't be surprised when they spend every major holiday with HER family in California.

Just like whiney needy children, whiney needy parents are unattractive. Practice being upbeat and busy with lots of interesting stories to tell whenever they happen to call and NEVER EVER imply that it has been rather a long time since they last made contact (even if it was three years ago.) ALWAYS sound surprised and pleased to hear from them because that Jewish mother guilt thing DOES NOT endear you to them or encourage them to call more often. If your own mother does this to you then you will know EXACTLY what I am talking about and if your own mother is perfect then you have ABSOLUTELY no excuse.

Mothers worry. We just can't help it. It's unavoidable, an incurable disease that we catch the day our babes are born and which slowly develops into a terrifying addiction that cannot be cured without a lot of very expensive therapy. Even when our children are independent adults and functioning perfectly well without ANY parental guidance we are predisposed to randomly lapse into neurotic mother mode and to drive our kids CRAZY over really stupid stuff. Even as we are telling them WHAT to do and HOW to do it we KNOW we sound totally RIDICULOUS but we just can't get past the place where we feel it's our duty as good mothers to do it. We can only hope that our children will learn to laugh at our nuttiness and will continue to love us anyway, as we have had to learn to do with OUR own Mothers. 

At the end of the day no matter how whackadoo we think our Moms are, if we can look in the mirror and be proud of what we see we have to acknowledge that they are at least partly responsible.


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Reader Comments (1)

Great blog Jude! You're a super "Mum".

May 17, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterLucia

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